Skip to main content

Can't Sleep. Home Improvement Dreams Will Eat Me.

I think I may have a bit of anxiety going on right now.

I say this because I am having the most realistic, vivid dreams I've had since high school (when I discovered lucid dreaming mostly in self-defense), and the dreams are all, I kid you not, nightmares about home improvement. And they're the worst kind of nightmares, that are absolutely terrifying while you're having them and then you wake up and realize that there was *nothing* terrifying or horrific about them. At all. The subject of the dream itself was entirely and completely mundane, and yet your heart is racing and there's sweat everywhere and your body apparently thinks that something just tried to kill you.

Case in point, the dream I had last night (which is all of a piece; my dreams are often serialized and this week has been no different) where I was remodeling my bathroom, woke up and forgot about the fact that the bathroom was under construction, took a shower, and then realized that there were giant holes in the floor and I had just flooded my basement and done huge damage to the floors and support beams of the house. I had that sick feeling you get when you realize you've just done something irretrievably stupid, irreversibly permanent, ludicrously expensive, and there is absolutely no one but yourself that you can blame for it. In the dream, I never actually went down to the basement, but I could hear the dripping water from the dark hole, and the creaking of the wet wood as it started to give (because, apparently in my dream, wood is water-soluble). And I was standing there trying to figure out how I was going to pay for the damage without robbing a bank or killing someone for the insurance money.

So, I suppose, the question is from where is this anxiety coming, and why suddenly now? I suppose it's a good thing I have therapy on Tuesday...

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Experience of Diversity (and the blindness of privilege)

Last year I made a vow to myself that I would only read books written by authors who were not straight white men. By and large, with two explicit exceptions, I was successful in my goal. And I learned a bunch of things. The first (and most important) thing I learned is that my reading habits were already moderately diverse; I made a list of ten of my favourite authors and nine of them were women, so I didn't really have to give up on anyone that I was particularly invested in. The second thing I learned was that my "historical read" list is actually pretty white/straight/male, though; I often go back and read a book again for comfort's sake, to go over familiar territory and comfortable writing and try and find something new or at least interesting. That means I haven't been doing a bunch of rereading and that led to... The third thing I learned, which is there are a LOT of non-cishetwhitemale writers in SF, both historically and especially currently. Just l...
Post a Comment
Read more

Organizing And You: Lessons from Labor History

    I made a joke on Twitter a while ago: Do I need to post the Thomas M Comeau Organizing Principles again? https://t.co/QQIrJ9Sd3i — Jerome Comeau says Defund The Police (@Heronymus) July 15, 2021 and it recently came back up because a member of my family got their first union job and was like "every job should be offering these sorts of benefits" and so I went ahead and wrote down what I remember of what my dad told me. My father had many jobs, but his profession was basically a labor union organizer, and he talked a lot about the bedrock foundation items needed to be serious about organizing collective action. Here's what I remember.    The Thomas M. Comeau Principles of Organizing -- a fundamental list for finding and building worker solidarity from 50 years of Union Involvement. This list is not ranked; all of the principles stated herein are coequal in their importance. Numbering is a rhetorical choice, not a valuation. 1) Be good at your job. Even in...
Post a Comment
Read more

So that happened.

I couldn't resist, and didn't really want to. So I bought an iPad. First Gen, but they're on significant sale right now, so I can use this one until July or august, when I'll buy an iPad2 and give this one to someone else. I named it "conspicuous consumption" because it seemed like truth in advertising. FYI, this blog post is coming from inside the tablet!
2 comments
Read more